Forget the Flask: A No-BS Guide to Groomsmen Gifts They’ll Actually Keep

I’ve been in the world of event planning for a long, long time, and I’ve seen countless grooms get completely stuck on one question: What in the world do I get my groomsmen?

Too often, this ends with a last-minute scramble for a generic flask or some novelty item that gets a quick laugh and then vanishes into a junk drawer forever. Honestly, it’s a huge missed opportunity. The gift you give your groomsmen isn’t just a “thanks for showing up.” It’s a real, physical nod to your friendship and everything you’ve been through. It’s a sign of respect.

This guide is built on helping guys move past the cheap trinkets and pick something with a little more purpose and soul. The goal is to give something that honors your friend, your bond, and the big day itself. Let’s get into the philosophy, some practical ideas, and the common mistakes to sidestep.

First Things First: Let’s Talk Budget

Okay, let’s address the elephant in the room: how much are you supposed to spend? There are no hard-and-fast rules here, but people always ask for a number. From my experience, most guys land somewhere in the $75 to $200 per person range.

But listen, that’s just a guideline. If your budget is tighter, a thoughtful, well-chosen gift at a lower price point is infinitely better than expensive junk. And if you’re in a position to spend more, that’s great too. The price isn’t the point—the thought is. Don’t get hung up on the number; focus on the meaning.

The Foundation: A Good Gift Tells a Story

Before you even open a browser tab to start shopping, take a second to think about what you’re trying to do. The perfect gift doesn’t really exist, but a meaningful one absolutely does. A truly great gift nails three things: it reflects the guy getting it, it reflects the friendship you share, and it reflects the importance of the occasion.

1. It’s About Him, Not Just the Group
The single biggest mistake is buying the exact same thing for every guy. Your friends aren’t clones. One might be a whiskey aficionado, another might be a die-hard coffee nerd, and a third might not drink at all. The one-size-fits-all approach feels impersonal because, well, it is. Think about each guy. What does he actually enjoy? Is he a practical, hands-on type or more of a sentimental guy? The gift should feel like you picked it for him.

2. It’s About Your Bond
A great gift often has a silent story attached. It might be a nod to an inside joke, a shared hobby, or that one college class you both obsessed over. Maybe you learned to fly fish together or spent a summer rebuilding an old car. Tying the gift to that shared history makes it more than just an object. It becomes a symbol of your connection. It doesn’t have to be cheesy, just genuine.

3. It Should Match the Moment
A wedding is a pretty significant life event. The gift should have a certain gravity to it. This doesn’t mean it has to be crazy expensive, but it should feel well-made and built to last. A flimsy plastic gadget feels temporary. A solid tool, a quality piece of leather, or a classic watch feels permanent. It shows you see both the friendship and your wedding as things with lasting value.

Totally Overwhelmed? Start Here.

Feeling the pressure? Do this one simple thing right now. Open the notes app on your phone. For each groomsman, write down one specific shared memory or inside joke. Just one. That’s it. This little nugget is the fuel for your personal note and maybe even the gift itself. See? Progress.

A Framework for Gifting: Three Tiers for Any Budget

I usually walk guys through three general categories. This helps organize your thinking and find the right approach for your crew. You can definitely mix and match ideas from these tiers.

Tier 1: The Classic, But Done Right

This is where you find those timeless gifts, but the key is to elevate them with quality and personal touches. This is where most people go wrong by grabbing the cheapest version they can find.

The Drinking Vessel: Flasks & Glassware

A flask is a classic, sure, but most of them are total junk. The cheap ones are made from low-grade steel that can make good liquor taste like you’re licking a penny. I once saw a groom give out a set of handsome-looking flasks, only to have his buddy send him a picture of rust spots inside a week later. Super embarrassing.

• What to look for: A good flask should be made from 304 or 316 food-grade stainless steel. It’ll feel heavy and the cap will screw on smoothly. A cheap one from a gift shop might be $15, but a quality one from a brand like Ragproper can run you $50 to $100 and will last a lifetime. For whiskey or cocktail glasses, look for lead-free crystal with a nice, solid base.
• Personalization tip: Instead of plastering “Groomsman” and the wedding date all over it, go for something more subtle and personal. Think about engraving his initials, or even the geographic coordinates of a meaningful spot—like your old college apartment or a favorite fishing hole.

The Everyday Carry: Knives & Lighters

A quality pocket knife or a durable lighter can be a fantastic, practical gift. Good tools are always appreciated.

• Choosing a Knife: The steel is what matters. Don’t get fooled by a cool design on a cheap blade. Look for reputable brands known for quality, like Case, Buck, or modern favorites like Kershaw. A classic Case Trapper with a bone handle is timeless, while a Kershaw Leek (which usually costs around $60) is a super reliable, modern choice. The point is to give a functional tool, not a toy.
• A Lighter with Style: A Zippo is an iconic piece of design. They’re tough, they’re reliable, and they come with a lifetime guarantee. That distinct click sound is universally satisfying. You can find them in tons of finishes, from classic brushed chrome to matte black. A simple initial engraving makes it personal without being loud.

Tier 2: The Shared Experience

Sometimes the best gift isn’t an object at all, but a memory. Gifting a shared experience can be incredibly powerful, especially for a group of friends who might not get to see each other as often down the road.

• A Curated Tasting: Instead of just handing over a bottle of whiskey, create a tasting kit. Buy a few 1oz or 2oz “Boston round” glass bottles and a small funnel (you can find these easily online). Fill them with a few different styles of a spirit—say, a bourbon, a rye, and a scotch. Add a proper tasting glass, and schedule a video call to go through it together.
• Tickets to an Event: If you all love the same team or band, tickets to a future game or concert are a fantastic idea. Pro tip: buy for an event that’s far enough out for everyone to plan. Or, even better, give a gift certificate to a ticket service with a note about what it’s for.
• A Skill-Building Class: Think about a class you can all take together—a barbecue masterclass, a cocktail-making workshop, or even something wild like a beginner’s blacksmithing course. Learning a new skill together is a serious bonding experience.

Heads up! For an event that requires travel, the gift is typically the ticket itself. Your groomsmen would usually cover their own travel and hotel unless you’re in a position to cover it all. The key is just to be clear about it upfront so there are no awkward surprises.

Tier 3: The Crafted Heirloom

This is for when you want to give something with significant, lasting value. These are investment pieces that can be passed down. This approach usually requires a bigger budget and a good sense of your friend’s personal style.

The Timepiece: A Marker of the Moment

A watch is maybe the ultimate heirloom gift. It’s both a practical tool and a symbol of a major life moment. But the watch world can be intimidating. Here’s a quick rundown on movements without getting too technical:

• Quartz Watches: These are battery-powered. They are incredibly accurate, durable, and more affordable. A fantastic, no-fuss option for a great-looking daily watch.
• Automatic Watches: These are powered by the motion of your wrist—no battery needed. They are little marvels of engineering and have a certain “soul” that watch nerds love. They need to be serviced every few years but can literally last a lifetime. It’s a bit like the difference between a high-performance electric car and a classic, hand-built roadster.

You don’t need to spend thousands. There are highly respected brands that make incredible automatic watches that won’t break the bank. Brands like Seiko and Orient are legendary for their quality. A Seiko 5 or an Orient Bambino are classic choices that are revered by collectors. You can often find these incredible watches for between $150 and $300, which is an amazing value. When buying, always go through an authorized dealer (like Long Island Watch online) or a very reputable seller to make sure you’re getting the real deal.

The Fine Leather Good

A quality leather bag, wallet, or belt can last for decades, getting better with age as it develops a unique patina.

Good to know: The grade of leather is critical. Look for “full-grain” leather—it’s the best quality and shows all the natural character of the hide. “Top-grain” is also very good. Just try to avoid anything vaguely labeled “genuine leather.” It’s a misleading term for lower-quality material that won’t hold up. For a truly special gift, look up a local leatherworker on a site like Etsy. You can commission a custom dopp kit or valet tray and the result is a one-of-a-kind piece with a great story.

The Final Touch: How You Give the Gift

How you present the gift is almost as important as the gift itself. A thoughtful item tossed in a cheap plastic bag just loses its magic. Assembling a curated gift box shows another level of care.

A simple wooden cigar box works great and even adds a nice scent. Use a natural filler like wood shavings. The goal is to make opening it an experience. Here’s a sample breakdown to show you how it can come together:

Example: The Outdoorsman Box (Approx. $125)

• Main Gift: Kershaw Leek knife (about $60)
• Consumable Item: A bag of high-quality, locally made beef jerky (about $15)
• Wedding Item: A pair of Darn Tough wool socks in the wedding color (about $25)
• Box & Note: A simple wooden box and quality cardstock (about $25)

See? Breaking it down like that makes it feel totally achievable.

And Please, Write the Note

If you do nothing else, write a sincere, handwritten note. It’s the heart of the whole gesture. You don’t need to write a novel. Just be honest. A simple structure works wonders:

1. Start with the ask: “I’d be honored if you would be my groomsman.”
2. Say why you chose him: Mention a specific memory. “From our time as college roommates to now, you’ve always had my back.”
3. Acknowledge his importance: “I can’t imagine going through this day without you there.”
4. End with thanks: “Thank you for being such a great friend.”

That note will be kept long after any consumable part of the gift is gone. Trust me.

A Few Final Words of Warning…

I’ve seen the same slip-ups happen over and over. Avoiding them is half the battle.

• The Obligatory Booze Gift: Please, don’t give a bottle of bourbon to your friend who is sober or just doesn’t drink. It’s thoughtless. This goes back to knowing your guys. A high-end coffee brewing setup or a great piece of outdoor gear would be a much better fit.
• Ignoring Lead Times: This is a HUGE stress-inducer. Custom engraving and shipping can take weeks. Plan on ordering your gifts at least 3 months before the wedding. If it’s something highly custom from an artisan, give it 6 months to be safe. You don’t want to be handing out IOUs at the rehearsal dinner.
• Legal & Safety Stuff: Just a quick heads-up. Shipping alcohol across state lines can be illegal for individuals. And knife-carrying laws vary wildly from state to state. It’s a thoughtful touch to include a friendly note about it. Also, a pro tip: reputable engravers will refuse to illegally engrave copyrighted logos, like a pro sports team’s emblem. Stick to initials and original designs.

A Final Thought on What Really Matters

Choosing a groomsmen gift can feel like just another chore on an endless wedding to-do list. But I’d encourage you to reframe it. See it as a rare opportunity to pause and formally recognize the friendships that got you here.

The object you choose is secondary. The real gift is the act of recognition itself—the moment you take to say, “Your friendship means the world to me, and I need you there for one of the biggest days of my life.” When you start from that place, you’ll always choose well.

Inspiration Gallery

When you’re choosing a leather item like a wallet or dopp kit, the term ‘full-grain’ is your best friend. Unlike ‘genuine leather,’ which can be made from lower-quality layers of the hide, full-grain leather uses the top layer, retaining all the natural imperfections and strength. It develops a rich patina over time, meaning the gift will actually look better ten years from now—a perfect metaphor for your friendship.

More than 75% of consumers would rather spend money on an experience than on a material item, according to a Harris Group study.

This doesn’t mean you have to skip a physical gift, but consider one that leads to an experience. A set of high-quality grilling tools from a brand like Weber or Napoleon could be paired with a gift certificate for a local artisan butcher shop. The tools are the gift; the shared BBQ is the memory.

Thinking beyond the object itself?

Consider the unboxing. A great gift can be made epic with the right presentation. Instead of just handing it over, place it in a custom wooden box engraved with their initials. For smaller items, use high-quality wrapping paper and a handwritten note. Brands like Swag.com offer customization options that can elevate the entire experience from a simple handover to a memorable moment.

• A high-quality automatic watch that will last a lifetime.
• A design that’s versatile enough for both a wedding and daily wear.
• A respected brand name without a luxury price tag.

The secret? A Seiko 5 Sports or an Orient Bambino. These watches are beloved by enthusiasts for their reliability and classic style, offering incredible value and a touch of horological class your friends will truly appreciate.

For the home mixologist: A bottle of high-quality bitters from Fee Brothers, a heavy-bottomed mixing glass, and a sleek bar spoon.

For the coffee aficionado: A bag of single-origin beans from a local roaster, an AeroPress coffee maker, and a handsome ceramic mug from a maker like East Fork Pottery.

For the weekend chef: A bottle of exceptional olive oil, a beautiful salt cellar, and a subscription to a magazine like Food & Wine.

Laser Engraving: Uses a laser to burn the design into the material. It’s incredibly precise, perfect for detailed logos or fine text on metal, wood, or even coated brass. Think of the crisp lettering on a Zippo lighter or a Victorinox pocket knife.

Embossing: Uses a heated stamp to press a design into leather. It creates a subtler, more textural effect that feels classic and luxurious. This is the ideal choice for personalizing a leather wallet or passport holder.

For a modern, sharp look, go with engraving. For timeless, tactile elegance, choose embossing.

“The details are not the details. They make the design.” – Charles Eames

Instead of a one-off gift, consider something that keeps on giving. A subscription box tailored to their interests is a fantastic way to extend the celebration. Bespoke Post offers curated monthly boxes with themes from cocktails to outdoor gear, while a service like Flaviar can deliver curated whiskey tasting kits right to their door. It’s a recurring reminder of your friendship.

Don’t just sign your name. A truly great gift is accompanied by a meaningful note. Mention a specific memory, an inside joke, or what their friendship means to you. It’s the one part of the gift that costs nothing but is often valued the most.

Can you gift something they’ll use on the wedding day itself?

Absolutely, but with one major rule: it has to be their style, not just your wedding’s theme. A pair of quality cufflinks, a classic tie bar, or even premium socks from a brand like Bombas or Darn Tough are all excellent choices. The key is that they should be items your friend would happily wear again. The gift is for him, not just for your photos.

• It’s for the friend who appreciates quiet quality over loud logos.
• It’s for the one who always has a solution in his pocket.
• It’s for the guy who has everything.

The secret? A high-quality pocket knife. Not a flimsy gas station model, but a thoughtfully chosen piece from a heritage brand like Benchmade, Spyderco, or even a classic Swiss Army Knife from Victorinox. It’s a tool, a piece of design, and a symbol of reliability.

A 2022 survey found that nearly 60% of American men own at least one pocket knife.

This isn’t a niche hobby; it’s a common staple. Upgrade his everyday carry with a quality blade. Consider the use case: a sleek, minimalist design like the James Brand’s ‘The Carter’ for the urban professional, or a rugged, dependable ‘Griptilian’ from Benchmade for the outdoorsman.

If your groomsmen are travelers, a durable and stylish dopp kit is a gift that will see years of use. For a rugged, heritage feel, look no further than a waxed canvas kit from a brand like Filson. For a more sleek, modern aesthetic, a full-grain leather option from Parker Clay not only looks fantastic but also supports ethical production. Both are significant upgrades from a disposable plastic bag.

Important: Double-check your personalization. There’s nothing worse than the excitement of a custom gift being ruined by a typo. Before you submit that order for engraved decanters or monogrammed wallets, review every initial, name, and date. One quick check can prevent a major, and often unfixable, mistake.

A great strategy for a meaningful gift is to upgrade something they use daily. Does he drink coffee from a chipped mug? Get him a self-heating Ember Mug. Does he use cheap earbuds? A pair of Grado SR60x headphones will change how he listens to music. Identifying a worn-out item and replacing it with a high-quality, ‘buy-it-for-life’ version shows you pay attention.

What if my friends have completely different tastes and budgets?

Embrace it! The modern approach is to set a consistent budget per person and then buy individually. Your outdoorsy friend gets a YETI Hopper Flip cooler, your homebody friend gets a premium Pendleton blanket, and your techie friend gets a smart speaker. The unifying theme isn’t the object itself, but the level of thought and care you put into choosing something specifically for them.

Sometimes the best gift isn’t an object, but a shared memory you create together. Forget the stuff and book an experience.

• A guided tasting at a local whiskey distillery or brewery.
• Tickets to see his favorite sports team play.
• A weekend camping trip or a round of golf at a course he’s always wanted to play.

For the friend who loves a project: Consider a DIY kit that aligns with his hobbies. You can find high-quality kits for everything from making your own hot sauce and brewing beer to crafting your own leather wallet. It’s a gift that provides both a cool item and a satisfying activity.

A handwritten letter is a creative act, and not just because of the beautiful cursive. It’s a deliberate act of intimacy. – The Art of Manliness

In an age of texts and emails, taking the time to write a genuine, heartfelt note is a powerful gesture. This single element can elevate any gift, making it deeply personal and unforgettable. Use quality stationery and tell him why he was chosen to stand beside you.

Timing is everything. Don’t hand over the gifts in the chaotic moments right before the ceremony. The best time is often during the rehearsal dinner or at a dedicated get-together the day before the wedding. This gives you a relaxed moment to properly thank your friends and allows them to enjoy the gift without the pressure of the main event.

A classic, well-made pen is an underrated but incredibly sophisticated gift. It’s perfect for the friend who values craftsmanship and utility.

The Parker Jotter: An iconic, all-metal design that’s been a workhorse since 1954. It’s durable, stylish, and offers a satisfying click. A true classic.

The Lamy Safari: A favorite of designers and architects, known for its modern Bauhaus-inspired design and smooth writing experience. It’s a statement of contemporary taste.

Both are affordable, built to last, and infinitely more personal than a generic gift card.

For the man who appreciates a good meal cooked over an open flame, a cast-iron skillet is a legendary gift. A pan from Lodge is an accessible, all-American classic. If you want to step it up, a modern, machine-smoothed skillet from Field Company is lighter and has a stunning finish. It’s a gift that gets better with every use and can be passed down for generations.

• A YETI Rambler for keeping drinks ice-cold or piping hot for hours.
• A powerful, reliable headlamp from a brand like Petzl or Black Diamond.
• A multi-tool like the Leatherman Wave+, the ultimate problem-solver.
• A Rumpl blanket made from recycled materials for post-hike warmth.

Can I get one big group gift instead of individual ones?

This can be a great idea if it’s an experience. For example, renting a cabin for the weekend for the bachelor party, covering the costs of a group activity like deep-sea fishing, or hiring a private chef for a memorable dinner. This approach emphasizes shared memory over material possessions and can be a fantastic way to bond before the big day.

Think beyond the big box store. A bottle of small-batch bourbon from a local distillery, a custom-scented candle from an artisan maker in your city, or hand-stitched leather goods from a nearby craftsman all tell a story. Gifting local not only supports small businesses but also gives your groomsmen a unique item they couldn’t find anywhere else.